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timtampon:

timtampon:

I was talking to my friend on the phone and then she almost got run over and i was obviously really concerned so i asked her if she was okay and after a moment she replied “there is a Jesus in the sky” in a really matter-of-fact sort of way
so obviously I thought something was seriously wrong butimage

omg please don’t bring this back
People are converting because of this post and I’m actually Jewish oh god I fucked up

(via pineplapple)

carnivaloftherandom:

curlykytta:

comedium:

news flash: bbc finally does something right

Listen up college kiddies that think your drunken escapades don’t matter!

Ooh, and bonus Colin Salmon.

(Source: comedium, via unicyclehippo)

christmasbarakat:

my dad is a cop and i just called him and he was like “hey i have a 17 year old boy in the back of my cop car right now that i’m running him to the station” and i asked if he was cute and my dad said “Hey, my daughter wants to know if you’re cute” and the guy said “i want to say yes, sir” and my dad started laughing so hard

(Source: ahcalamity, via unicyclehippo)

thecutestofthecute:

So I lost like 10 followers for posting pictures of rottweilers

okay

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then

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fine

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Puppy party without you guys

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LATER HATERS

(via unicyclehippo)

thorki:

acexlove:

one of the greatest pixar moments; a family thats ok with you coming 2nd 

they were hiding their identities as superheros not making a statement

(Source: attackoncat, via unicyclehippo)

(via sextnoise)

(Source: 90s90s90s, via sextnoise)

unabating:

Holy shit how much does that cat weigh
trickystarz:

AYYYYY AYYYY AYYYYYYY

popularboyfriend:

guy:

*slides you $20* pls stop ignoring me

hey look a $20 bill

(Source: guy, via beyoncevevo)

(Source: thatnutcray, via sextnoise)

mild-bloom:

i dont need a valentine i need 8 million dollars and a fast metabolism

(via gnarly)

maxtaroisheretoo:

Times are changing…

(via beyoncevevo)

Today I went to Subway.

There were these 12 year old boys hanging around. As I got my food and left they were all checking me out like little prepubescent lemurs and one of them said “Can I get your number?” And I turned around and said “Why, you need a babysitter?”

image

(Source: beautilation, via beyoncevevo)