WAKE UP POTTER
WE’RE GOING TO THE ZOO
Oh i get it now.
i think we’re out of ink
have you tried turning it on and off again
I LOVE CATCHING PEOPLE SMILING AT THEIR PHONES BECAUSE IS IT A CUTE TEXT?? IS IT PORN???? WHO KNOWS BUT I’M GLAD YOU’RE HAPPY FRIEND
i have a special folder for photos of small dogs snoozing on large sleeping places
Guys, let me tell you about orcas.
Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.
The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:
THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.
Why has nobody mentioned what’s happening in the original gif?
This is how orcas hunt - or, it’s one of the ways they do. They have a ton of tricks and techniques they use to fuck up everything below them on the food chain, and that gif portrays my personal favorite.
Orcas will literally BEACH THEMSELVES to grab unsuspecting seals (or whatever else happens to be splashing around in the surf) and snarf them down like hot dogs. Yeah, that’s right. This is a 6-ton apex predator, crashing right out of the fucking water to snatch their prey right off the beach. Any other animal that size would get stuck there and die, but do you see that fucker? He fucking wriggles right back into the surf. An orca can get all the way up onto dry land and still manage to wiggle their way back into the water to fuck up more shit on another day. There is literally no other sea-dwelling creature of comparative size with that ability - most sea animals lack the muscular strength to move without enough water supporting their weight.
Orcas have also been known to eat moose. Yeah, that’s right. Fucking MOOSE.
You don’t fuck with orcas.
and please dont fuckin put them in small chlorine tanks like wtf get those motherfuckers back into the ocean away from children
god bless gordan ramsey
Dude is only a dick to adults, awesome.
because, those adults should know what they’re doing, they’re cooks these are kids hes teaching to cook, therefore he is patient.
gordon ramsey is one of my favorite people in the whole world ok
The only reason he gets so angry is because the people he’s yelling at claim to know what they are doing and are charging people accordingly. If you listen to why he’s actually angry more than half the time you’d realize you’d be furious too. This man is beyond patient and kind toward people in normal circumstances, but he is really serious about his profession and what should be demanded of it. He’s one of my favorite people too
But have you seen “Hotel Hell” tho.
There was an elderly couple on there who lost EVERYTHING and he bought them a FREAKING APARTMENT.
The guy has a huge heart, no kidding.
Gordan Ramsey is my favourite person in the entire world
Laura Benanti’s tweets: September edition
creatures who have become way too used to people filming them.
hello friends britney is here
goodbye friends britney is gone
MY MUM JUST GOT SNAPCHAT IM DYING
A very accurate depiction of a cat owner.